Reporter-At-Large

Pass the gravy, doc

If you're looking to increase your cholesterol levels, go no further
than your hospital cafeteria

By Marcello Palmieri

Tasty steamed hot dogs, burgers covered with melted processed cheese, fries drowned in thick brown gravy, not to mention a variety of cakes, chips, soft drinks and whatever else your heart desires. Sound like the menu at your local greasy spoon? Guess again — it's actually what you'd find if you decided to dine between shifts at Montreal's Royal Victoria Hospital.

It's one o'clock in the afternoon and the cafeteria is busy. The room is filled with doctors, nurses, patients, and hospital visitors chowing down, mostly on trans fat-riddled delights. A doctor waits impatiently ahead of me in line for the cash, a greasy burger and a jumbo-sized cookie on his tray. I make my move and ask him: "Why would a place where doctors and nurses work feverishly hard to improve people's health, allow fast food to dominate the menu?" Caught off guard by the question, he lets out a hearty laugh before answering "I really don't have time to talk about it" and rushes off in the other direction. Two other doctors sitting at a nearby table seem not to hear me, while another looks up, smiles politely, and then turns his attention back to his heaping plate of egg rolls and fried noodles.

At the other end of the cafeteria, a doctor sitting on his own spoons soup into his mouth as he reads the paper. When asked why he thinks junk is the food of choice, he furrows his brow and replies nervously, "I can't talk right now. I have patients waiting for me and I have to get back." It seems these tight-lipped docs won't be spilling the beans on their workaday food habits today.

THE FAST FOOD FACTS
Finally, I get some members of the cafeteria staff to shed some light on why the hospital serves so many dishes that would send even moderately health-conscious eaters scurrying for a cholesterol check. "Well, the hospital could have more healthy foods, but we try to accommodate everyone," says the supervisor, who asked to remain anonymous. "We do surveys from time to time and these are the things they want."

A kitchen worker who also prefers to remain anonymous, says the request for Sloppy Joes and anything deep fried come directly from the staff. "Interns at the hospital are looking for junk food," she says. "Some have told me that eating a lot of chocolate keeps them going."

The two cafeteria employees were at pains to point out that there are also fresh fruits and vegetables available, as well as vegetarian dishes and low fat options. The number one seller at the hospital cafeteria is pasta, but junk food brings in its fair share of the dough. The total sales on a typical day are anywhere from $5,000 to $7,000 and the profits are channelled back into the hospital's resources.

As for the future of the cafeteria, they're planning to hire a new chef and have some of the menus reworked. Judging from the number of customers in line for the grill, it looks like the cafeteria's menu won't be changing radically anytime soon.